There are a lot people talking, writing and podcasting about "deconstructing one's faith." And most of what I am hearing and reading has been helpful, and in a "I'm not alone or going crazy" way, to hear others' stories was, and is, encouraging.
However, for me it wasn't my faith that needed to be deconstructed, it was my theology. I had faith, but it was a faith that was being built on a faulty foundation. My faith was based on my denomination's doctrine (or "creed"), in my own ability to "properly interpret scripture" and in the so-called "inerrancy" of the Bible.
What I had to come back to was why I became a Christian in the first place. It was because I chose to believe in the Gospels' testimony about Jesus. It's not that I believed (or was required to believe) that every single word in the Gospel accounts (or in the Bible at large) was 100% accurate. It was that the testimony about Jesus was compelling and his teaching was so needed, that I was willing to risk being wrong and thus chose to follow him. That is the rock upon which I decided to build a life of faith.
That refocus led to deconstructing and then reconstructing (which is always a work in progress) my theology. For me, and I'm not saying this is everyone's experience, it wasn't my faith that needed to be deconstructed, it was my view of the nature of God and God's work in this world in and my life that needed a complete overhaul.
Two passages in Matthew (among others) are most helpful in building my life of faith on the foundation of Jesus:
“Everyone then who hears these words of mine and acts on them will be like a wise man who built his house on rock. The rain fell, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not act on them will be like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell—and great was its fall!” (7:24–27)
Now when Jesus came into the district of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, “Who do people say that the Son of Man is?” And they said, “Some say John the Baptist, but others Elijah, and still others Jeremiah or one of the prophets.” He said to them, “But who do you say that I am?” Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.” And Jesus answered him, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father in heaven. And I tell you, you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not prevail against it. I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” (16:13–19)
And then there's this passage from Paul:
According to the grace of God given to me, like a skilled master builder I laid a foundation, and someone else is building on it. Each builder must choose with care how to build on it. For no one can lay any foundation other than the one that has been laid; that foundation is Jesus Christ. (1 Corinthians 3:10–11).
I found that building my life of faith on the foundation of denominational doctrine or creed, and/or on my own ability to properly interpret scripture, and/or on my the so-called "inerrancy" of the Bible, I had built my faith on sand. Indeed, the rains came down, the streams rose and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell like a house of cards! As hard as that was, I'm so glad for those storms. Now I'm striving to build my life of faith on why I became a Christian in the first place--the life, the deeds and the teachings of Jesus of Nazareth.
